Push, Push, Push

Don’t stop

For a pat on the back

Unless you’re looking

For a slap in the face

Push, push, push by Robert Rodriguez. June 21, 2019. 9:44PM

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Let it go

Have you ever been sad?

Have you ever

Had a lump in your throat that felt impossible to swallow?

Have you ever

Have you ever

Been on the verge of tears

And feel the one that’s about to fall

Before the first stream was ready to carve

A trail of broken dreams

Heavy memories?

Have you ever

Cried

For seemingly

No reason

Have you ever

Allowed the tears to flow?

Let it go by Robert Rodriguez. June 2, 2019. 1:23AM

The trip

He handed me a small bottle of “bless oil”

And instructed me to make a cross 

On mine and my sons forehead nightly

I did it a few times 

But mostly forgot 

Although something told me to bring it 

When we made the 36 hour non stop trip 

Through the southwest

Down El Paso

Through the border 

And south through many states In Mexico

Final destination 

Jalisco

It was a tough trip 

Frigid

Especially through the pitch black 

Narrow two lane highway

One lane heading our way

South

And the other 

Filled with truck drivers

Obviously familiar with the roads

Hauling double 53 foot trailers

Whizzing by as if it were mid day

And there were no hazards around

Blind corners on nauseatingly winding mountain roads

Heading north through Durango

Where

For the first time ever

I drove through snow flurries

While hugging the narrow shoulder

Not trusting the painted yellow line 

Separating the North and Southbound lanes

After finally getting through the darkness

Into a more well lit two lane highway

My head felt like it was attached by a wooden plank

With 2 inch nails strategically placed at the back of the neck 

Keeping me in one piece

But stiff with stress

Which was a motherfucker

It didn’t get any easier when we finally reached the hotel

In Encarnacion De Diaz, Jalisco 

Better known as La Chona

After finding parking in front of the church

And a hundred feet from the town square

We made our way into the lobby 

Got our room keys and opened the squeaky iron doors

As quietly as you can at 5AM

In what sounded like an echo chamber of a hallway

Clanging and banging like a steel drum 

as I opened and closed it as carefully as possible

Never in my life had I felt anything like the enclosed space my son and I now found ourselves in

A chill that took my breath away for a moment

Skin crawling 

Every hair standing on end 

Something happened there

Fear overcame me 

Although I tried to be calm 

For my sons sake and for my sanity

Tearing into my luggage with a fury 

Was my immediate reaction

Bless oil

Bless oil

Bless oil 

The only thing on my mind

First thing 

Slather my sons forehead with a cross

Then my own

The head of the bed

The foot of the bed

Even the pillows

Above every door 

The bathroom mirror 

And a few more places just for good measure

Got in bed 

Held my son tight 

Eyes practically welded shut out of fear of seeing something out of a nightmare

And proceeded to pray like I’ve never prayed before

Amazingly I survived the night and fell asleep

Only to be woken up about 2 hours later to 

Rumbling that shook the 10 foot tall doors 

That stood where a normal hotel would have a window

It took a moment to realize that every time a car passed by 

on the narrow street below it shook the room

The blessing ritual would become my routine 

For the next 7 most frightening and most religious days of my life

The trip by Robert Rodriguez. May 14, 2019. 12:43PM